I'm the KY Gorilla Guy

The trials, tribulations, adventures, and random public appearances of the KY Gorilla Guy

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Gorillas (suffering) In The (humid) Mist


Us gorillas are in the news again. We just can't seem to be stopped. This story is about a gorilla, just like me, who now has a pacemaker, not like me. I hope he makes it with that artificial ticker as long as I hope to. I wonder how long I can keep up with these public appearances though in THIS heat. This costume is heavy and like wearing a vest made of insulation. I wish I could install an air conditioner inside my clothes like Marty had in Back to the Future 2. Does anybody know how to do that? I'll pay you in bananas!

Friday, August 18, 2006

I finished first in the race! (in the gorilla division)

According to the two media representatives who interviewed me following the Midsummer Night's Run, I won my division! I was the first gorilla to cross the finish line - in just under 8 minutes I might add! That's not bad for a gorilla who is used to walking on all fours. I mean that concrete is hard and well, I was distracted with all the people around me. Most of us gorillas you see, are introverts. So people running around as fast as they can pushing little people in strollers was just enough to nearly upset my banana cart. My picture was taken by lots of people (all of whom didn't email them to me!) and even a Lexington Herald-Leader photographer, but I did not receive any press attention the next day. I'm a happy, jolly, content KY Gorilla Guy though as I did receive a lot of laughs and smiles (and a few shocked faces, but we won't talk about those) and low fives from little kiddos. I had fun dancing along the way and running faster than a lot people who had a lot less hair on their body (and clothes to cover them) than I did. I kept looking for bananas at the finish line, but I only saw oranges, which, clearly, they should know, is not my thing. I thought I put that on my entry form. I'll email the race organizers to know that they better have them next year!

Tuesday, August 15, 2006

Wanted: Single, adventurous, female Gorilla who enjoys long strolls through the produce section

It seems there is hope for us fellow primates trying to meet some lady primates. Orangutans in the Netherlands apparently have a web hookup for dating other orangutans as far away as Borneo according to this BBC article. I find it hard to believe, but then again those zoo animals are a whole different breed, and not just because they're orangutans and I'm a gorilla. I wonder if the zookeepers will spread the love our way to all primates, or only give it up to my orange brothers and sisters. I am officially single all you hot gorilla sistas!

Thursday, August 10, 2006

Everyone else ready for the big race?


I am registered for the big race. Actually, I sent a friend to get my number at John's Running Shop (he tells me it is a super cool place by the way). The registration lady apparently bought it that my name was Ky. Guy (as short for Kylen), so I filled in the rest, and now I'm running (or probably walk a tad) as KY Gorilla Guy. So I'll be at the race on Saturday - the one-miler of course -> I am in a gorilla suit. Are they going to have bananas? Does anyone know? I go better with bananas.